xeryfyn's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Dreading Work is it bad that all I would like to do is quit work and stay home? Well, maybe that's not entirely true for right now. I guess I wouldn't mind working part-time if I knew that Julia would be in a place that she liked being everyday. It's hard to drop her off for 10 hour days in a room that I know she is pretty miserable in. She is generally well-adjusted and I know that she eventually calms down and plays there with the other kids. But I dont think that she is truly happy with the room, the caregivers and the fact that I am on the other side of the door. As Christmas and the New Year approaches with a rapidity that is amazing me even as I drag myself to work and back again day after day, I begin the steady annual year-end introspection and nothing is too small to be analysed and turned over in my concious and unconcious hours. Slowly, I am coming to believe that just as life is too short to spend with people you care little for and who make you feel bad, it is also too short to while away the hurs of your work days toiling mercilessly at a job which binds you and leaves no room for professional growth and personal satisfaction. That said, I can't afford to not work at all, you know? Gah. If anyone out there has a job that is perfect for me then, by all means, forward it immediately. I know things are getting really scary when returning to retail is beginning to look kind of appealing. Help! 11:25 p.m. - 2003-12-14 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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