xeryfyn's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Sleeping Trials We are trying out the next step in letting Julia cry it out. We had been letting her drink her bedtime milk in the comfort of our bed and, after finishing, when asleep, half-asleep or merely drowsy, we would then transfer her to her crib for the night. She would protest a bit, usually less than 5 minutes and then settle herself in. but tonight we have decided to start putting her down in her crib right away and it hant been the easiest of transitions. It is difficult enough to listen to your child cry, harder still when you know it that you have caused it and even more so though you know that it is for the best. She has begun to dread the approach to her crib, clinging a bit tighter, chubby little arms wrapped tightly around the neck and pressing her little face to my cheek, the mantra "no, no, want, want" while gesturing back to the comfort of our bedroom. My heart breaks a little, wanting to sweep her back into my arms when she begs for "hugs, mama" clinging to the rails of her crib, tears streaking down her little face. But. I have to do this, if not for her own sake learning to soothe herself to sleep without the presence of mom and dad beside her, then for mine and for the little one that will come into her life in a short time. She will need to know how to sleep even when mom is tending to the other one, to soothe herself because my attentions may have to be soothing the baby. And I know that she can do it, has done it before and will learn how to do it again. But I have to let her go, let her experience this hardness, this disappointment and sorrow, if only to grow up just a little bit more. Gah. more of those things they didn't tell you before having kids. 12:22 a.m. - 2004-03-21 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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